Easter was right before both of my April babies were due. I remember vividly the challenge of making plans to lead while also asking people to be on standby for such a big service! More than one person had visions of my water breaking while standing at the pulpit!

In pregnancy, time and plans are held loosely. It’s enough to drive the most flexible of people crazy. Crisis, change, and uncertainty are parts of life we seek to avoid at all costs. Partly because of the powerful emotions they evoke. Today is Good Friday: a day of crisis for the Disciples; a day of reverence and awe for disciples today.

The Disciples’ plans, conscious or not, were turned upside down and they did not know how to respond. We know they responded with fear, anxious about what would happen next. We know they responded with despair, feelings of defeat, and doubt. We know they responded with grief, presuming an end to their dreams.

But we also know that Jesus doesn’t shame any of them for their responses. Jesus doesn’t shame Peter for his denial, doesn’t ignore Thomas in his doubt, and even seems to have some pity for Judas for his betrayer. Jesus took it all, held it, and literally rose above it.

All of our feelings are valid in the midst of trial, crisis, and upheaval. It’s what we let Christ do with those feelings in the long term that matters. I encourage us to take all that we are experiencing to Jesus. God is not overcome or angered by our difficult emotions: fear, doubt, despair, hopelessness, grief… Whether we think those feelings and thoughts are good or bad, right or wrong, bring them into the light of Christ!

Run to the tomb this Easter. Weep with Mary in the garden. Wrestle with Thomas in the locked room. Throw yourself and your guilt into the Sea of Galilee with Peter to reach the shore where Jesus stands. Together with Christ, we will weather any storm, be transformed by any suffering, and rise anew into whatever God calls us next.